Drawing Inspiration From Real Life

One day this past school year, I caught Colson playing Minecraft when he should have been doing schoolwork. I threatened to delete the game from his computer.

Later that day he took an English test. He had to make up sentences for one part.

Zachary Phelps

Zachary has been wanting to pass his green band swim test at the pool this summer, which would enable him to swim in the deep end unchaperoned, go down the slides, etc. The test consists of swimming the entire length of the pool, and then treading water for 60 seconds. Zach attempted and failed earlier this summer, because unbeknownst to me the requirements had changed. You can no longer swim underwater the whole way, you have to do some semblance of a freestyle stroke.

So for the past few weeks I've been helping him practice his freestyle. I told him a few days ago I thought he was ready to try the test again. He was hesitant, but decided to trust me. I said a little prayer that he wouldn't fail again, twice in a row might have ended his swimming career for good.

I could tell that towards the end of his swim his little body was getting tired, but he made it.



His celebratory jump into the deep end after earning his green band says it all.

NFL Brain Damage History

Presented By: MedicalBillingandCoding.org

Credit to @SubEWL.

Style, Not Quantity

Only my mother (well, and Melissa Tabasso) can move into a house 2 weeks before 90% of her furniture and decor is delivered, and for those 2 weeks make it look like she lives in a model home.

100 Riffs

100 Riffs (A Brief History of Rock N' Roll) from Chicago Music Exchange on Vimeo.

So very cool, found by my brother Eric. 100 famous guitar riffs, played back to back in a single take, that gives a brief history of rock and roll.

How To Bring A Burly Man To His Knees (And The Creepy Woman Following Behind Him)

At Walmart the other day. Saw a big burly man walking with two boys and a little tiny curly haired blonde girl in a floral bubble skirt. She was holding on to his cart and taking lots of little tiny girl steps to keep up with him, in her little tiny white summer sandals. Little girl looked up at the big burly man and said in her little tiny girl voice, "Daddy, can you call me Lovey now?" Big burly man looked at her and said in a not-very-big-burly-man voice, "Of course, Lovey!"

I fell a little bit in love with that big burly man for a minute.

The Broken Jug

So, my husband has one of those 5 gallon glass milk jugs that he keeps spare change in.

Well, the other day the kids needed quarters for something, so as I usually do in that situation, I went to the milk jug to get a few. As I tipped the jug on its side to shake some coins out, I heard a loud pop and realized all the coins were spilling out the side of the jug! Somehow a circular section about 4 inches in diameter shattered.

We haven't picked the coins up yet, mainly because Eric says he won't pick them up until he has a replacement jug. Yesterday I got an email from him: subject line "You Owe Me One Of These" and this link in the body. 

Yesterday he came home from work, walked over to his dresser to put down his wallet, and then walked over to the pile of change and dropped his spare pennies into it. It was so funny seeing pennies drop from the hand of the meticulous Eric Mosley on to the bedroom floor, as if that was where they belonged. The coin pile has inspired conversations like this:

Eric: You still owe me a jug.

Me: I got your jugs right here.

Eric: Those don't hold quarters

I don't know, it kind of looks artsy to me. Like some kind of cool abstract sculpture....like it's supposed to mean something really deep. 

Will she ever buy him that jug? Will the coin pile ever be cleaned up? Will there eventually be an ER visit because someone forgets the broken shards of glass under the coins?

Put Your Desks Away!

My brother Eric sent me this link to a piece of furniture I think would be genius for homeschooling families!

As If From Nowhere bookcase

Store your schoolbooks AND your desks all in one place!


*In other news, Solomon saw yesterday's post and IM'd me:

Solomon: I've never had a whole blog post to myself before, praise jojoba oil.

Get Off The Roads NOW

My friend Solomon recently got his driver's license. After living in NYC for his entire life and never needing to learn to drive, he decided it was time to learn a new skill! He im-d me Friday morning:






Solomon: I drove to work today

no one died

Me: It's a new day

Solomon: Crazy, huh? A couple of times I thought I was going to crash, but I would just close my eyes, let go and say "JEBUS TAKE THE WHEEEEEL!"

(Solomon is my best atheist friend. Yes, I have more than one. He likes to make up new names for Jesus and Jehovah...his current favorites are Jebus and Jojoba.)

In other Solomon news, he sent me an email from work the other day. He works for Revlon, and Revlon has created a new line of rhinestoned eyelash curlers. He asked if I wanted his, because:

Solomon: I don't use an eyelash curler often enough.

Yep, he doesn't use them OFTEN ENOUGH.

I love that guy.

What's The Dewey Decimal Code For Children's Sex Books?

My niece Brooke sent me the following link to a hysterical children's book from the 70s called "How A Baby Is Made". The drawings are enough to send you into fits of church giggles. If you get to the drawing of the baby crowning and you don't wet your pants, you need to look at it again.

Make sure you click through them all, and don't forget to read the "Sexplanations" from the blogger, beneath each page of the children's book.

"HOW A BABY IS MADE"


I think that most of us who came of age in the 70s and 80s, especially those of us in religious households, learned about sex via a book our parents gave us. For my brother Andrew and I it was, "Susie's Babies", a book about an classroom of students who had a pregnant hamster. The teacher explains to the children how the hamster got pregnant, and the students watch the hamster give birth.

As my brother Andrew jokes, "It was great! After reading the book, I knew how hamsters got pregnant. I still knew nothing about sex, but I could sure as heck teach a class on the hamster birthing process!"

Did your parents give you a book to help you learn about sex? If so, what was it?

Bilingual

I heard the funniest story about my great-nephew Josh, who is 8. He has cousins who are deaf, so he and his brothers and sisters have learned sign language. They Skype with their cousins sometimes, and the other day Josh came running to his mother, Bonnie, saying, "Mom! I was just talking deaf with my cousins!"

So cute, I love it. I'm totally going to call sign language "talking deaf" from now on. What languages do you speak? Spanish? German? Josh speaks English and Deaf.

I learned to do Braille when I was in elementary school. I guess I was writing blind!!

Ava & Zach Make The Cut

 A friend brought me a copy of the recent Schwenkfelder Library and Heritage Center brochure. There were a couple of familiar faces in it! I've written about the library before, they have great homeschool programs.

Dancin' Mosleys

The videos from dress rehearsal for my kids' dance recital. My husband has the videos from the actual performance, hopefully he posts them soon...When finding a Mosley in a dance video, look in the back. Tall kids are always in the back. That's why we love solos.

 

Ava's Egyptian ballet routine. Zach says, "Are they supposed to be the Israelites??"




Ava's Hairspray jazz routine. After which Colson says to her, because 8 months of hip hop has apparently made him a jazz expert, "Ava, I saw one little problem in your jazz routine. You weren't shimmying as much as the other girls. I could tell because the strings on your dress weren't moving as much as theirs". But those of you who know my introverted Ava know that what she's doing in this video is akin to her having an epileptic seizure.




And Colson's Michael Jackson tribute hip hop routine. He comes in from the right side in the beginning, he's the one without the glove. Because he lost his. Shocking. Ava was irritated because this routine got all the applause. I had to explain to her that when 37 out of 38 routines are all girls, that one routine with all boys is going to get the crowd going. Plus any routine featuring Michael Jackson moves is going to get applause. I said even if all the boys fell on their faces the audience would applaud loudest for them. It's like a routine filled with babies and puppies.


We asked Zachary if he wanted to be in the dance recital next year. He said, "I think I'm more of a sports guy than a dance guy...."

They Need Stunting

Colson and Ava, 10 and 9. Whatever are they going to look like at 17 and 16?

Goodnight Cars

Baby Zachary used to make me tuck his cars in with him at night. I miss baby Zachary.

Yesterday 6 year old Zachary said we should have another baby. I asked why. He said, "So that there will be at least one kid who doesn't boss me around!" I asked, "What if the new baby starts messing up all your stuff and crying all the time?" He said, while he rolled his eyes in exasperation at my ignorance, "Uh, we'll just take it to the Adoption Center."

Ava's Bucket List

I went into my daughter Ava's room the other day to put away clothes, and I found this taped to the wall behind her door. Her bucket list. I mean, it's about time. Tick tock, she's not gettin' any younger. One day you're 9, the next day you're 87, am I right??

This is the key to the list. Her mama's girl...

What you may not know about #5 is that Ava's had opportunity to go on roller coasters, she's just chosen not to. So that one is about overcoming a fear. And apparently #6 is the priority for this summer. 

#2 makes me laugh. She knows that KEEPING the pet is the hard part around here...

Sarah is Ava's best friend who lives up the street. 

No idea what the "egg tree" is. 

Since catching Bigfoot is this summer's priority, Ava made a plan. I'm guessing Bigfoot likes peanut butter? Or maybe that's for the girls to eat while they lie in wait...

And she knows that in this day and age, nothing really happens unless you have photographic evidence.

So I Like Baths, Big Whoop...

Ava and Zach were having dinner together the other night. Ava got herself a glass of water out of the refrigerator dispenser and Zach got the jug of milk out to pour himself a glass. The following exchange occurred:

Ava: Do you know what I like about water? You don't have to put it back after it's poured, like you do when you have milk. You can just sit down and drink.

Zach: Do you know what I like about water? My mother's always in it.

....Wow.

Laughing Babies

I babysat Charlotte for Brooke a few weeks back, and I spent the entire day making her laugh. It's way fun. She laughs when you talk about her poop, which makes her Brooke's daughter for sure. The giggles at around 2:30 are what I would do anything for. But the funniest thing is that I showed Charlotte this video at lunch with Brooke the other day, and Charlotte watched it and laughed at herself. I wish so much that I'd had a second video camera to capture that...

Memorizing On The Toilet

Zachary saying his memory verses for Awana.

Art Therapy

Every night I walk into Ava's room every night to tuck her in and see this picture Eric drew for her taped over her bed, and it's hard to remember why I'm ever irritated at him.

The Creative One

My brother Andrew's birthday video for my mother. These are all houses my parents lived in, and I'm assuming the pictures are superimposed over the actual location where they were taken...


He also worked on the 2012 Remix of Ava's remake of Dynamite.

My Thumb Hurts Now

Ava borrowed Cole's guitar the other day and started rocking out in her room. Taio Cruz's Dynamite was the song of the day, and she tore it up.

I'll Show You...

Zachary got in trouble the other day, Colson told on him and then Eric punished him. Well, Zachary got so mad at them both that he ran up to his room and slammed his door. A few minutes later he came back out, stormed downstairs, grabbed some paper and a crayon, wrote something furiously, then took the paper back upstairs.

I guess he couldn't find any tape to attach the sign to his door in the usual way. 

Three exclamation points and a mad face. He wasn't kidding around...

My 6'4" Boomerang

So I've mentioned my husband's greatest gift before; the confidence and speed at which he can turn an argument around on you. Not many people can out-word me, and even fewer can out-confidence me, but Eric Mosley comes closer than anyone.

Here's another great example:

One night Eric fell asleep before me. I was reading, and by the time I was ready to go to sleep, he was snoring like a grizzly bear deep in hibernation. Usually a gentle kick or a little push will be enough to get him to roll over, making the snoring stop.

So I nudged him on the shoulder to make him roll over. He woke up a little bit and mumbled, "Why are you pushing me??"

I said, "I can't sleep because you're snoring so loudly!"

He mumbled, quick as wink though still half asleep, "Well, I can't sleep when you're criticizing me!"


I couldn't stop laughing in amazement at his skill. Even in his sleep he's a word boomerang.

Happy Mama's Day

My mother. In her 70+ years she's been a model, an actress, a baton twirling star, a missionary, a pastor's wife, a jewelry salesperson, a dental assistant, a line dance instructor, a motivational speaker, a foster parent, a beauty pageant winner, a Welcome Wagon lady, a seamstress, a funeral director, a choreographer, an interior decorator, a bible study leader and a fashion icon, and a myriad of other things I can't even recall. Renaissance woman is an understatement. A jack of all trades AND a master of them.

I've seen her make a roomful of people laugh and I've seen her make grown men cower. I've seen her inspire women to take charge and speak up for themselves and I've seen her soothe inconsolable newborn babies to sleep. I've seen her open her home to hundreds of foster children and needy adults, and I've seen her always make time for herself. I've seen her love her family while standing up and disagreeing with them completely. I've seen her make a mistake, and I've seen her realize and correct it.

She hasn't always been liked by the world, but she's always been respected. There's no one like her, and that's a damn shame.

That's my mother.

Baby Charlotte and her big toe. Like trying to get blood from a turnip...

Shows That I Love: New Girl

Shows that I love. We're starting with New Girl, obviously. The premise: a dorky teacher moves in with three single guys. Nick, a poor bartender. Winston, a small-time basketball star who played on a European team but since his return to the US is having a hard time finding work, and Schmidt, a womanizer with OCD. She quickly earns her way into their hearts with her lovably nerdy ways, and the four of them become best friends.

New episodes air on Fox on Tuesday nights, so normally my Wednesdays are ripe with emails, IM's, and Facebook wall posts from Melissa, Richard, Solomon and Mark R., that consists of random funny New Girl one-liners.

For instance, Melissa will email me and just say, "Why is she dressed like a woman's studies major?"  Or Mark R. will post on my Facebook wall, "I'm sorry, but that's how the electoral college works."  Or Solomon will IM me from work saying, "I'm going to have to reinstitute my ban on high-waisted shorts."

So to whet your appetites and tempt you to watch the whole season, here are some fun clips, and the lines from them that were left on my voicemail, worked into conversations, and mumbled during dance rehearsal arguments to lighten the mood (always works, by the way). Most of our favorite scenes are not available anywhere easily accessible on the INternet, so you'll have to watch on fox.com or OnDemand, or purchase the first season on amazon.com or iTunes. Or you can do what I do sometimes be a really evil selfish person and download free torrents.



"You want me to do a voice?"
"You look ravishing in your netting contraption.."


"Who washes a towel? The towel washes me!"


"I can taste my spine"


 "This is the saddest song....in the woooorrrld.."
 "cause the ice in the glass represents the tears from my eyes, dawg"


"I'm like a Dominican teenager playing Little League. It's just not fair for anyone else."
 "I'm feeling pretty twirly..."


"What if I had a croissant blog???"

 
"TWO MOONS HAVE PASSED!!"
 "Why do you start talking like a Native American when you get angry?"


"The downstairs neighbor put a password on their wi-fi..."
"I thought he was going to try to sell us something."


"Bees are dying. Don't pretend to know my pain..."


"It's like you're ripping the side block out of my mental Jenga."

Two Kings

The Awana closing program was this past week. Cole and Ava were in a skit, they each played a king. In a brilliant typecasting move, Ava was King Kindness and Cole was King Meanness. Ava's the king in the first half, Colson the king in the second half. Cole had everyone laughing with his dramatic mean king....

 

We're Not Worthy

I've been watching Wilson Phillips: Still Holding On on the TV Guide Network. It's a big ol' bag of crazy and I LOVE IT. Wendy Wilson is fairly normal, but Chynna and Carnie are absolutely cuckoo!!!! 

In episode three, Carnie is recovering from her 23rd stomach stapling/lap band surgery. Chynna feels like Carnie is exaggerating her pain, so she decides to move in and help Carnie get up and around. Chynna makes her vegetable juice, has Carnie repeat affirmations all day, and does breathing exercises with her. 

At one point, Chynna puts her finger over Carnie's left nostril and the following exchange occurs:

Chynna: (in a very serious and breathy yoga voice) Breathe in deeply through that nostril.

Carnie: I can't, my sinuses are clogged.

Chynna: When your sinuses are clogged, it just means you're afraid to breathe. That somewhere deep inside you're afraid of breath; that you don't feel like you're worthy of breath.

Watch Eric's Head Explode

Ava made a Welcome Home From Work sign on the driveway for Eric the other day, in chalk. Apparently Eric is amazing, powerful and fresh looking. I'm not quite sure what to say about that. 

A Useful Pitcher To Put Things In

My nephew Robert loves workin', especially with his hands. Give him a task or don't, he'll create one for himself anyway. He reminds me of Eeyore on his birthday, remember In Which his gifts ended up being a popped balloon and an empty honey pot? He didn't care because he realized he could do something cool with his gifts. He could put the deflated balloon INTO the pot, and then take it out again. Over and over.

I'm totally getting @LittleRFL a cup, a pitcher and a bag of ice for his next birthday.



 

My Sanctuary = C-Section Recovery Room

Thanks to my husband for taking another step towards making our bedroom the hospital room of my dreams. A wall mounted flat screen tv. 

Now all I need is a Craftmatic adjustable bed, leg compression tights, a catheter, a shaved ice machine, a woman in scrubs to come in and roll me over once a day to change my sheets, a giant shower with a chair in it, and a Tylenol with Codeine on my nightstand, and I'll have the relaxing bedroom of my dreams.

Ava's Recipe

Ava wrote a recipe today. I'm excited to try it. The texture and flavor profile seems exciting.

My Dawg

This is my public apology to Melissa for seething at her back yesterday while we trained for next weekend's 5k together. For feeling like Dumpy Asthmatic Decrepit Smurf while she bounced along like Peppy Encouraging Bouyant Smurf. For wanting to yell at her, "For the love, if you're gonna run all peppy like that you might as well just start whistling like the 7 stupid dwarfs too!" For having to fight back the urge to slap her silly after each, "Come on, you can do it! We're almost there!!" For almost screaming out, "If you don't start huffing and puffing in 5 seconds, our 30 year friendship is over." For wanting to "accidentally" step on one of her happy rainbow colored laces and make her trip so I'd get 20 seconds to walk.

After all that, she got us both to run our longest and fastest: 3.3 miles at 9.57 minutes per mile. I run much faster when I'm hating on someone. Like those damn dogs that attacked me a few weeks ago. Today, Melissa was my pair of yippy biting dogs. Fortunately, I controlled myself and didn't kick her across the road.

....And I guess she runs faster with the Devil on her heels.

New Showdance Time!

Big day! Headed up to Manhattan to get our new 2012 Showdance choreography from the one, the only, Ronnie Debenedetta.

Who is Ronnie Debenedetta, you ask? *Gasp*! Shut your mouth. Only a gazillion time UCWDC Masters World Champion and US Open West Coast Swing Champion.

 






He's going to choreograph a west coast swing for us, to Jamie Lono's acoustic version of Folsom Prison Blues, from The Voice.

The Big Winners!

Examples of my award winning students from the MidAtlantic Dance Classic! Each of my students danced 7 or 8 dances with me, and they both won first place in their divisions. Here are two of Paul Grande's dances, his two step and his east coast swing:

 

 And here are two of Stan Wojciechowski's dances, his cha cha and his west coast swing:
 

The Face That Launch'd A Thousand Ships

 Colson, circa 2003.  

Gramma and the little Mosleys

Yoga Master

I was stretching after a run the other day. Zachary sat down and said, "Mom, you need to do this when you stretch....Ommmmmm."

My Girl

My daughter Ava. I can't even stand it.

MidAtlantic Dance Classic

Richard and I will be performing at the MidAtlantic Dance Classic next weekend, along with some other great pros. Always a fun event.

MidAtlantic Dance Classic!! ~ Swing, Country, Hustle ~ an EXCITING weekend VARIETY dance event filled with Social Dancing, Pro-Am & Couples Competitions, Jack & Jills, Workshops, Dance Vendors & a FABULOUS Show w/Dinner  Baltimore, Maryland at the delightful Westin Hotel @ BWI Airport 443-577-2300 March 30 - April 1, 2012  www.MidAtlanticDanceClassic.com *A fully-sanctioned UCWDC qualifying Event

Quick Links Register Now Join Our List

Dance ALL Day AND Night at MDC !!! NEW THIS YEAR - WCS Social Dancing Friday AND Saturday nights, featuringexcellent swing dance tunes by DJ Dean Garrish FRIDAY NIGHT - WCS Social Dancing starts at 8:00 pm on the Swing-Only Dance Floor; Pizza Party & Variety Social Dancing starts when competition ends in the main ballroom SATURDAY NIGHT - WCS Social Dancing starts at 9:30 pm on the Swing-Only Dance Floor; Variety Social Dancing starts when the Dinner/Show ends in the main ballroom Special Dance Party Pass Rates Per Night: $15 advance purchase thru 2/29/12 $20 on-site BUT WAIT, there's more ... purchase a Dinner/Show ticket ($65), and it includes the Saturday night Dance Party Pass ~OR~ add $10 to that Dinner/Show ticket, and we'll throw in the Friday night Dance Party Pass Remember: 2-Day VIP Passes and 2-Day General Admission Passes include the Friday and Saturday night Social Dance Parties!! BOOK Your Hotel Room NOW !!! Special Event Rate ENDS TOMORROW - 3/12 Westin Hotel @ BWI Airport 443-577-2300 As for Special MDC Event Rate: $119  NEW THIS YEAR: Your special MDC Event rate includes Westin's scrumptious Hot Breakfast Buffet !!! Lots of Pros = FABULOUS Dinner Shows at MDC !!! Check out highlights of previous MDC Dinner Shows:www.MidAtlanticDanceClassic.com  Mark & Sylvie Mark Davidson & Sylvie Raymond join us from Canada, and are the reigning UCWDC Showcase Masters World Champions.  They are a wonderfully entertaining couple, bringing speed, breath-taking tricks, and humor to the floor. Mike & Colleen  Mike Zuspan and Colleen Concannon, UCWDC Classic Masters competitors, join us from Arizona, where they teach Ballroom, Swing, and Country.  They bring elegance and grace in motion to the dance floor, and inspire us with their performances! Anton & Tanya Anton Tregubov and Tetyana Oliynyk are 3 time 2011 Rising Star Latin U.S. Champions.  Joining us from New York, they are a strong force on the dance floor, bringing a sexy Latin flair to our show.     Suzanne & Richard Suzanne Mosley & Richard McMurrich are Classic Masters UCWDC competitors representing the Northeast, from New York City and Philadelphia.  They are dance teachers, judges, and choreographers, but their first love will always be entertaining audiences by bringing their unique brand of speed, style, and sass to the dance floor! To Order Dinner & Show tickets, or for more information about MidAtlantic Dance Classic, to to: www.MidAtlanticDanceClassic.com  or call:  703-803-9621 We hope you'll join us at MidAtlantic Dance Classic for a great weekend of dancing ! Sam Arvidson, Anita Huffman-Strawser, & Dale Strawser Event Directors, MidAtlantic Dance Classic

Welcome Dylan!

Introducing Reason 16, my newest great-nephew Dylan Francis Messina!

Dylan was almost a leap year baby and almost an episode of Rescue 911, as Brianne got to the hospital at 12:45am March 1st and he was born at 12:58am. It's so hard to believe that the little girl Melissa and I called "Baby Brianne" now has two babies of her own.