I have a friend who made a comment at the pool the other day that struck me as so demonstrative of how so many people in this world think.
She was complaining about how hard it is to teach your kids lessons, when so many of the other kids "out there" don't adhere to those same lessons. So when your kids go out there in the world, they are hearing all of these words, and seeing kids do all of these things, that they are not allowed to say and do.
She said "I just wish all of the kids in the world had to adhere to the same rules. That would make my life so much easier and my kids would be so much less confused."
I felt so badly for her, because I see her frustration all the time. She wants so badly to teach her kids the right thing, and in her mind, sees all of her hard work being picked apart. And it's true, it is hard for kids these days, especially kids who have parents who try to enforce some rules. So many parents don't anymore, so kids who live with rules are a rarity. But I wish that I could help her see this from a different perspective...
I have such a different view of the same situation. For instance, neither my nor her kids are allowed to say the word "stupid". When she hears other kids at the pool using the word stupid in conversation with her children, it makes her very frustrated. When I hear other kids at the pool using the word stupid in conversation with my kids, I secretly love it. I sit back and listen, to see if my kids will stick to what they know, or if they will succumb to the pressure and join in.
If every kid in the world had to live by the same rules, they would grow up ever really believing in anything. If you don't say stupid just because no one in the world is allowed to say it, then you haven't learned the lesson. You're just a robot blindly following rules.
For me, character is built in those situations. If my kids can "keep their heads when all around them are losing theirs", then they have really become SOMETHING. The more often your beliefs are tested, the more chances you have to strengthen your character.
And nothing is more important to me as a parent than raising my kids to be people of character.
Welcome to Being Suzanne Mosley
Thursday, July 24, 2008
Wednesday, July 23, 2008
Where's The Beav When You Need Him
What has happened to childhood? Why does it seem that everyone these days is okay with kids only getting 2, maybe 3 years of innocent childhood before they start being exposed to adult words and themes?
My older children have been showing signs of wanting to move up to the next rung of television shows. Meaning, the squeaky clean story lines of Wonder Pets, Dora, Jay Jay and all the rest on channels like Noggin and Sprout, might be starting to lose their luster. Shows like SpongeBob, Fairly OddParents, and all of the "tween" shows on Nick and Disney channel are starting to look more titillating to them. Well, that's because they ARE more titillating. Adult themes are everywhere you turn in these shows.
I know some of you are going to read this and think "oh, she's so archaic"..."she's so overly protective"...well, you're obviously part of the problem with the current culture, so if you think I'm going to listen to you...........!!!!!!!!!!!!
The media does not care about the pace at which your child learns about things, especially as it relates to sexual matters. There is no "easing" knowledge; making it age appropriate. That is YOUR job as a parent.
I fully understand that difficult information is going to get into my children's brains no matter what I do. I expect that. But I am not going to take a "que sera sera" approach. And I'm certainly not going to ADD TO what the world is already going to throw at my kids.
Knowledge of this sort is like a jagged little pill for young people's brains. It's got sharp points that cut holes in their insides. It's your job as a parent to ease the way for this knowledge. You are the Pepto-Bismol for your child; the KY Jelly; the Tums. You get my drift. You are supposed to prepare the way for these jagged little pills of knowledge to enter your child's brain, so that they do the least amount of damage, and are digested with the least amount of pain.
I've heard people say "oh, relax, it's no big deal. Learning about sex is natural and organic." That is absolutely true, in a perfect non-media driven world. I have no problem with my children learning about sexual matters in a natural way. But what is "natural"? Is there any chance for "natural" in today's world? What is NOT natural or organic is seeing sex in every single television show and magazine ad. It's NOT natural to be bombarded with images and sounds of a sexual nature. Kids today have no chance to naturally learn about sex, as it's coming at them from birth in every UNnatural form possible.
People have argued with me that the shows and movies for kids these days are benign, and I'm overreacting. Let's talk about the word "benign" for a moment. Benign is a very subjective term, when not being used to reference a cancerous tumor. When you think of something as benign, it's because you're comparing it to something else. In my opinion, those of you who believe that these tween shows are benign have been desensitized by the media.
Yes, these tween shows are benign in our culture because these days, by the time you're 20 years old, you've seen video clips of two naked girls shitting on each other in a bathtub on YouTube. And you've seen pictures of people having sex with animals on the internet. And you've been through public middle and high school recently, where girls giving guys blow jobs on the busses is an everyday occurrence. So of course when you're 8 and you're watching shows where girls are trying to get guys to think they're "hot", and guys are looking at girls as sex objects, you're going to be looking for something MORE than that by the time you're 18 or 20.
So yes, these tween shows are benign, comparatively speaking. 50 years ago Hannah Montana would have been worried about failing her math exam, and about telling a white lie to her parents. Right now Hannah Montana is stuffing her bra and worrying about whether or not she's sexy, and talking extremely disrespectfully to her father, and obsessing about and competing with other girls for boys. Hannah Montana in 25 years from now might be screwing a horse in the girls bathroom, and taking naked pictures of her crotch and posting them on MySpace. That doesn't sound so benign right now, but will it seem benign in 25 years?
Maybe it's the proverbial chicken and egg...Maybe it's not that kids are exposed to it so early because the world is desensitized. Maybe the desensitization is CAUSED by exposing kids to the beginnings of this crap earlier and earlier. Maybe if we stop exposing kids to this stuff so early, the desensitization will slow down. I mean, HELLO...how does that not make sense????
For the love...........
Welcome to Being Suzanne Mosley
My older children have been showing signs of wanting to move up to the next rung of television shows. Meaning, the squeaky clean story lines of Wonder Pets, Dora, Jay Jay and all the rest on channels like Noggin and Sprout, might be starting to lose their luster. Shows like SpongeBob, Fairly OddParents, and all of the "tween" shows on Nick and Disney channel are starting to look more titillating to them. Well, that's because they ARE more titillating. Adult themes are everywhere you turn in these shows.
I know some of you are going to read this and think "oh, she's so archaic"..."she's so overly protective"...well, you're obviously part of the problem with the current culture, so if you think I'm going to listen to you...........!!!!!!!!!!!!
The media does not care about the pace at which your child learns about things, especially as it relates to sexual matters. There is no "easing" knowledge; making it age appropriate. That is YOUR job as a parent.
I fully understand that difficult information is going to get into my children's brains no matter what I do. I expect that. But I am not going to take a "que sera sera" approach. And I'm certainly not going to ADD TO what the world is already going to throw at my kids.
Knowledge of this sort is like a jagged little pill for young people's brains. It's got sharp points that cut holes in their insides. It's your job as a parent to ease the way for this knowledge. You are the Pepto-Bismol for your child; the KY Jelly; the Tums. You get my drift. You are supposed to prepare the way for these jagged little pills of knowledge to enter your child's brain, so that they do the least amount of damage, and are digested with the least amount of pain.
I've heard people say "oh, relax, it's no big deal. Learning about sex is natural and organic." That is absolutely true, in a perfect non-media driven world. I have no problem with my children learning about sexual matters in a natural way. But what is "natural"? Is there any chance for "natural" in today's world? What is NOT natural or organic is seeing sex in every single television show and magazine ad. It's NOT natural to be bombarded with images and sounds of a sexual nature. Kids today have no chance to naturally learn about sex, as it's coming at them from birth in every UNnatural form possible.
People have argued with me that the shows and movies for kids these days are benign, and I'm overreacting. Let's talk about the word "benign" for a moment. Benign is a very subjective term, when not being used to reference a cancerous tumor. When you think of something as benign, it's because you're comparing it to something else. In my opinion, those of you who believe that these tween shows are benign have been desensitized by the media.
Yes, these tween shows are benign in our culture because these days, by the time you're 20 years old, you've seen video clips of two naked girls shitting on each other in a bathtub on YouTube. And you've seen pictures of people having sex with animals on the internet. And you've been through public middle and high school recently, where girls giving guys blow jobs on the busses is an everyday occurrence. So of course when you're 8 and you're watching shows where girls are trying to get guys to think they're "hot", and guys are looking at girls as sex objects, you're going to be looking for something MORE than that by the time you're 18 or 20.
So yes, these tween shows are benign, comparatively speaking. 50 years ago Hannah Montana would have been worried about failing her math exam, and about telling a white lie to her parents. Right now Hannah Montana is stuffing her bra and worrying about whether or not she's sexy, and talking extremely disrespectfully to her father, and obsessing about and competing with other girls for boys. Hannah Montana in 25 years from now might be screwing a horse in the girls bathroom, and taking naked pictures of her crotch and posting them on MySpace. That doesn't sound so benign right now, but will it seem benign in 25 years?
Maybe it's the proverbial chicken and egg...Maybe it's not that kids are exposed to it so early because the world is desensitized. Maybe the desensitization is CAUSED by exposing kids to the beginnings of this crap earlier and earlier. Maybe if we stop exposing kids to this stuff so early, the desensitization will slow down. I mean, HELLO...how does that not make sense????
For the love...........
Welcome to Being Suzanne Mosley
Cause You'll Roll Right Past Those Pearly Gates
My kids recently attended VBS at Christ's Church of the Valley, where we regularly attend. My kids loved it, it's very well organized and very "whoopie".
I just have a few issues with CCV's VBS (I like typing and saying that...I say it out loud to myself every time I type it. Try it, it's fun!). The first is, CCV holds a contest among the kids for who can bring the most new people to VBS, and whoever wins gets a shiny new scooter.
Now, I realize, CCV's VBS is poorly attended. I know plenty of churches around here that get those numbers. Those numbers won't get CCV into any hall of fame, that's for sure..........
But on both Thursday and Friday morning's drive to camp, both of my older children were crying. Why? Because we had "forgotten" to bring friends to camp, thus ending their opportunity to win the shiny new scooter. For one, the sadness even turned into a twinge of anger at me, for not helping in the quest for the scooter.
Wow, fun camp! Can't wait for next year!
Putting pressure on children is more than slightly pathetic. If you absolutely can't help yourself in the quest for more more more, send a note home to the parents. Put the pressure on the people who are more equipped for it, the adults. Fight fair. You don't have to sit in the car for 35 minutes every morning with my children and talk them down from their ledge. VBS isn't supposed to make my life difficult and make my children feel stress.
My kids went to a lovely little VBS at a local Mennonite church with some friends a few weeks ago. This church had a total of 25 kids attending, in grades K-6. Gotta tell ya, there were no clowns or flashing lights or giant Moonbounces, but my kids didn't cry on the way to camp every morning....the attitude there was simply "your friends are welcome here!".
Also, CCV does tons of advertising beforehand. Tons of marketing. Which is great. Get the word out there. But once camp starts, why not focus completely on the kids who are ALREADY THERE? Why make the kids who are already there feel like it's not about them? You only win a prize around here if you bring more people.
My last issue is that it seems like CCV's VBS is just a big push to get more people coming to Sunday services. Get the parents to come back here. Do whatever it takes to get the families to come back on Sunday.
Why is so much focus on Sunday numbers? Why not just focus on the kids who come to camp? I realize that the paybacks of that focus would be much more long term than next Sunday, but shouldn't that be what a KID'S camp should be about? Planting seeds in children's minds and souls? So that in 10-20 years down the road when they get their first car, they might have a moment where they say to their mothers "hey, remember that cool VBS you took me to that one summer? Remember those Bible verses they taught me? I've been thinking about those lately, and I think I might want to go back there".
Slightly manipulative, I must say. And manipulating via children....
Hey, here's an idea...why not give out a scooter to whoever memorizes the most Bible verses?!!!!! At least that contest wouldn't be self-serving.
I can't help but feel like my kids were used as pawns in someone else's contest for THEIR shiny new scooter.....child labor is illegal, you know.
I just have a few issues with CCV's VBS (I like typing and saying that...I say it out loud to myself every time I type it. Try it, it's fun!). The first is, CCV holds a contest among the kids for who can bring the most new people to VBS, and whoever wins gets a shiny new scooter.
Now, I realize, CCV's VBS is poorly attended. I know plenty of churches around here that get those numbers. Those numbers won't get CCV into any hall of fame, that's for sure..........
But on both Thursday and Friday morning's drive to camp, both of my older children were crying. Why? Because we had "forgotten" to bring friends to camp, thus ending their opportunity to win the shiny new scooter. For one, the sadness even turned into a twinge of anger at me, for not helping in the quest for the scooter.
Wow, fun camp! Can't wait for next year!
Putting pressure on children is more than slightly pathetic. If you absolutely can't help yourself in the quest for more more more, send a note home to the parents. Put the pressure on the people who are more equipped for it, the adults. Fight fair. You don't have to sit in the car for 35 minutes every morning with my children and talk them down from their ledge. VBS isn't supposed to make my life difficult and make my children feel stress.
My kids went to a lovely little VBS at a local Mennonite church with some friends a few weeks ago. This church had a total of 25 kids attending, in grades K-6. Gotta tell ya, there were no clowns or flashing lights or giant Moonbounces, but my kids didn't cry on the way to camp every morning....the attitude there was simply "your friends are welcome here!".
Also, CCV does tons of advertising beforehand. Tons of marketing. Which is great. Get the word out there. But once camp starts, why not focus completely on the kids who are ALREADY THERE? Why make the kids who are already there feel like it's not about them? You only win a prize around here if you bring more people.
My last issue is that it seems like CCV's VBS is just a big push to get more people coming to Sunday services. Get the parents to come back here. Do whatever it takes to get the families to come back on Sunday.
Why is so much focus on Sunday numbers? Why not just focus on the kids who come to camp? I realize that the paybacks of that focus would be much more long term than next Sunday, but shouldn't that be what a KID'S camp should be about? Planting seeds in children's minds and souls? So that in 10-20 years down the road when they get their first car, they might have a moment where they say to their mothers "hey, remember that cool VBS you took me to that one summer? Remember those Bible verses they taught me? I've been thinking about those lately, and I think I might want to go back there".
Slightly manipulative, I must say. And manipulating via children....
Hey, here's an idea...why not give out a scooter to whoever memorizes the most Bible verses?!!!!! At least that contest wouldn't be self-serving.
I can't help but feel like my kids were used as pawns in someone else's contest for THEIR shiny new scooter.....child labor is illegal, you know.
Saturday, July 19, 2008
Wake Up Little Suzie, Wake Up
My absolute favorite time of the day is that moment right before you fall asleep, when you are still conscious enough to realize you're about to fall asleep. When you feel it coming, that heaviness in your chest, like your heart is sinking into a pit. It's like that moment at the peak of a rollercoaster hill. When you know that in one more second, you will be flying straight down a mountain. I could live in that moment forever...sweet anticipation.
I wish I could somehow consciously experience sleep.
Welcome to Being Suzanne Mosley
I wish I could somehow consciously experience sleep.
Welcome to Being Suzanne Mosley
Friday, July 18, 2008
I Sound Like Pollyanna...
So I had a huge realization last weekend at the dance competition. I have spent 15 years, off and on, in an organization in which I have not developed one serious relationship.
Why? Take a guess:
1) I don't like to expend any energy on people who aren't in my inner circle.
2) I just assume that people aren't going to "get" me, and thus am doing them a favor.
3) I am a complete introvert, and have a very hard time initiating relationships.
4) If I put time into a relationship with "outside" people, I am gypping my "inner" people
5) General people have nothing to offer me
6) I don't believe most people are sincere
7) I just don't care about people
8) All of the above
If you answered 8, you are correct.
I had a VERY rare moment of vulnerability last weekend, and suddenly realized that maybe, just maybe, these people that I've been ignoring might actually have an interest in me. That they just might be sincere in their caring for me. That I may have been shutting out people who could add something lovely to my life.
I have resolved to keep my mind open to putting more effort into new relationships.
To be continued....We'll see how this goes.
Welcome to Being Suzanne Mosley
Why? Take a guess:
1) I don't like to expend any energy on people who aren't in my inner circle.
2) I just assume that people aren't going to "get" me, and thus am doing them a favor.
3) I am a complete introvert, and have a very hard time initiating relationships.
4) If I put time into a relationship with "outside" people, I am gypping my "inner" people
5) General people have nothing to offer me
6) I don't believe most people are sincere
7) I just don't care about people
8) All of the above
If you answered 8, you are correct.
I had a VERY rare moment of vulnerability last weekend, and suddenly realized that maybe, just maybe, these people that I've been ignoring might actually have an interest in me. That they just might be sincere in their caring for me. That I may have been shutting out people who could add something lovely to my life.
I have resolved to keep my mind open to putting more effort into new relationships.
To be continued....We'll see how this goes.
Welcome to Being Suzanne Mosley
Wednesday, July 9, 2008
So Happy Together?????
This past Sunday morning, I asked my husband (Mr. ENFP) if he would mind taking the kids to church without me, so that I could clean the house without them around. He agreed, even though he isn't the biggest fan of doing things with less than the full family unit.
As he was getting dressed, he said "But wouldn't you rather we all clean the house together?".
Okay....I will try to describe the sensations that occur to my body when I hear the word "together". First, the walls start moving slowly towards where I'm standing. Then, my ears start to feel "full", as if there is pressure building all around my brain, and it is about to explode out of the closest holes. Lastly come the biting ants. They start crawling up my arms, taking little bites all the way up, and make their way quickly down my torso to my legs. I actually have to resist the urge to slap at them, they feel so real...
As I've explained before, I have to prepare for togetherness. I can only take so much of it. And I NEVER think to do "tasks" together. Mainly for reasons of efficiency. I can clean the house so much faster all by myself, than if I am delegating tasks out to people. Also, I can not abide having discussions ABOUT tasks while DOING tasks. It's just all so foreign to me.
As he was getting dressed, he said "But wouldn't you rather we all clean the house together?".
Okay....I will try to describe the sensations that occur to my body when I hear the word "together". First, the walls start moving slowly towards where I'm standing. Then, my ears start to feel "full", as if there is pressure building all around my brain, and it is about to explode out of the closest holes. Lastly come the biting ants. They start crawling up my arms, taking little bites all the way up, and make their way quickly down my torso to my legs. I actually have to resist the urge to slap at them, they feel so real...
As I've explained before, I have to prepare for togetherness. I can only take so much of it. And I NEVER think to do "tasks" together. Mainly for reasons of efficiency. I can clean the house so much faster all by myself, than if I am delegating tasks out to people. Also, I can not abide having discussions ABOUT tasks while DOING tasks. It's just all so foreign to me.
My husband would be happy if, as a family, we spend every waking hour together...eating together, working together, playing together, shopping together, travelling together, living/laughing/loving together, you get my point...
And I love him for it. After all, what could be wrong about wanting to spend all of your time with the ones you love??
I will admit, the times when my husband has convinced me to do something "together", I usually end up enjoying myself. Which is probably why God brought him into my life...but no matter how many good together times he's able to force me to have, it will never be my instinct to do together...I will always have to fight the ants.
Fortunately, he'll never stop trying.
Sorry baby.
Welcome to Being Suzanne Mosley
Hey Sugar, You Wanna Browse Through My Ads Tonight?
So according to my brother the Blog Nazi, I am now a blogging whore. You wanna click on my links, baby? The only difference is my links won't give you an STD.
I once worked at a temp agency in Nashville, TN. One company I worked for hired a second temp, a lovely girl by the name of La'Quisha...or was it Ta'Niqua....maybe Sha'Rondelle...Nedine? Anyway, she once said something while on the phone with her mother, complaining about how her mother had forgotten to pee in a cup for her that morning, so that she'd have clean pee to use for her mandatory drug test, and because of that mistake, she had to make an extra trip to her boyfriend's house, to get him to pee for her, making her too late to pick up her paycheck that week (did you follow that???):
"I gots ta get PAYYYYYYYYYYYYYED!"
Welcome to Being Suzanne Mosley
I once worked at a temp agency in Nashville, TN. One company I worked for hired a second temp, a lovely girl by the name of La'Quisha...or was it Ta'Niqua....maybe Sha'Rondelle...Nedine? Anyway, she once said something while on the phone with her mother, complaining about how her mother had forgotten to pee in a cup for her that morning, so that she'd have clean pee to use for her mandatory drug test, and because of that mistake, she had to make an extra trip to her boyfriend's house, to get him to pee for her, making her too late to pick up her paycheck that week (did you follow that???):
"I gots ta get PAYYYYYYYYYYYYYED!"
Welcome to Being Suzanne Mosley
Tuesday, July 8, 2008
A Rows By Any Other Name
This morning I went to Walmart to do grocery shopping for the week. There was only one checkout lane open, and Nedine (oh yes, not NAdine, but Nedine...) was working, one of your standard Walmart old ladies.
Let me just take one moment to say, I reflect on the name Nedine every time I see her. Did her parents think that changing the spelling of a relatively common name, Nadine, would make her unique and cool? Or did they just not know how to spell Nadine? FYI, "Nadine" means hope in Russian...Nedine means nothing....exactly.
I put my week's worth of groceries on the belt, and while she was checking my items out, a man got in line behind me. A man wearing your typical painter's uniform. Blue collar, salt of the earth guy in painter's pants and cap. He was purchasing two things; a can of paint, and a paintbrush. He put these items on the belt just past where my stuff ended.
As Nedine is scanning my items, she is talking to me, because I grocery shop in the early mornings all the time, and she's usually there. And also because Nedine has no ability to pick up on non-verbal cues. She is also making small talk with the painter guy.
She gets to my last item, bags it, and then turns back to the belt and picks up the can of paint and scans it. I say "that's not mine" and the painter guy says "that's mine".
Nedine immediately grabs one of the grocery item seperator bar things, and holds it up and proceeds to berate the painter guy for not using it. How else is Nedine supposed to know where one order ends and another one begins? Because Nedine is certainly not paid to deduce things. She certainly can't be expected to take note of her surroundings and then come to conclusions based on them. Oh no, only people in high level management positions are supposed to do those things. Nedine only gets paid to perform like a mindless drone, like a trained monkey. If you want Nedine to actually use her brain, you need to give her a raise.
And, um, a brain...............
Welcome to Being Suzanne Mosley
Let me just take one moment to say, I reflect on the name Nedine every time I see her. Did her parents think that changing the spelling of a relatively common name, Nadine, would make her unique and cool? Or did they just not know how to spell Nadine? FYI, "Nadine" means hope in Russian...Nedine means nothing....exactly.
I put my week's worth of groceries on the belt, and while she was checking my items out, a man got in line behind me. A man wearing your typical painter's uniform. Blue collar, salt of the earth guy in painter's pants and cap. He was purchasing two things; a can of paint, and a paintbrush. He put these items on the belt just past where my stuff ended.
As Nedine is scanning my items, she is talking to me, because I grocery shop in the early mornings all the time, and she's usually there. And also because Nedine has no ability to pick up on non-verbal cues. She is also making small talk with the painter guy.
She gets to my last item, bags it, and then turns back to the belt and picks up the can of paint and scans it. I say "that's not mine" and the painter guy says "that's mine".
Nedine immediately grabs one of the grocery item seperator bar things, and holds it up and proceeds to berate the painter guy for not using it. How else is Nedine supposed to know where one order ends and another one begins? Because Nedine is certainly not paid to deduce things. She certainly can't be expected to take note of her surroundings and then come to conclusions based on them. Oh no, only people in high level management positions are supposed to do those things. Nedine only gets paid to perform like a mindless drone, like a trained monkey. If you want Nedine to actually use her brain, you need to give her a raise.
And, um, a brain...............
Welcome to Being Suzanne Mosley
Saturday, July 5, 2008
As I Lay Me Down To Sleep
ISTJ: Lord, help me to relax about insignificant details beginning tomorrow at 11:41:23 a.m. E.S.T.
ISTP: God, help me to consider people’s feelings, even if most of them ARE hypersensitive.
ESTP: God, help me to take responsibility for my own actions, even though they’re usually NOT my fault.
ESTJ: God, help me to not try to RUN everything. But, if You need some help, just ask.
ISFJ: Lord, help me to be more laid back and help me to do it EXACTLY right.
ISFP: Lord, help me to stand up for my rights (if you don’t mind my asking).
ESFP: God, help me to take things more seriously, especially parties and dancing.
ESFJ: God, give me patience, and I mean right NOW.
INFJ: Lord, help me not to be a perfectionist. (Did I spell that correctly?)
INFP: God, help me to finish everything I sta
ENFP: God, help me to keep my mind on one th - Look a bird! - at a time.
ENFJ: God, help me to do only what I can and trust you for the rest. Do you mind putting that in writing?
INTJ: Lord, keep me open to other’s ideas, *wrong* though they may be.
INTP: Lord, help me to be less independent, but let me do it my way.
ENTP: Lord, help me follow established procedures today. On second thought, I’ll settle for a few minutes.
ENTJ: Lord, help me slow downandnotrushthroughwhatIdo.
found at http://catholicspitfiregrill.com/2008/06/29/intj-here/
ISTP: God, help me to consider people’s feelings, even if most of them ARE hypersensitive.
ESTP: God, help me to take responsibility for my own actions, even though they’re usually NOT my fault.
ESTJ: God, help me to not try to RUN everything. But, if You need some help, just ask.
ISFJ: Lord, help me to be more laid back and help me to do it EXACTLY right.
ISFP: Lord, help me to stand up for my rights (if you don’t mind my asking).
ESFP: God, help me to take things more seriously, especially parties and dancing.
ESFJ: God, give me patience, and I mean right NOW.
INFJ: Lord, help me not to be a perfectionist. (Did I spell that correctly?)
INFP: God, help me to finish everything I sta
ENFP: God, help me to keep my mind on one th - Look a bird! - at a time.
ENFJ: God, help me to do only what I can and trust you for the rest. Do you mind putting that in writing?
INTJ: Lord, keep me open to other’s ideas, *wrong* though they may be.
INTP: Lord, help me to be less independent, but let me do it my way.
ENTP: Lord, help me follow established procedures today. On second thought, I’ll settle for a few minutes.
ENTJ: Lord, help me slow downandnotrushthroughwhatIdo.
found at http://catholicspitfiregrill.com/2008/06/29/intj-here/
Cleanup In Aisles 1 Through 10
I should talk about what goes through my mind while shopping, because I have noticed over the past few years that this particular issue causes people obvious stress.
I feel, when I am shopping, that I am a customer. Strange, I know...I also feel as if, as a customer, I am not there to pay you so that I can do your job for you. I know, this gets weirder by the minute.
I will use the example of the Ross/Marshalls/TJMaxx line of stores, since I shop those chains very often. I have spent large amounts of money in these shops.
I feel absolutely no need to, for instance, make sure I put things back on the hangers right-side out after trying them on. I feel absolutely no remorse when halfway through the store, I decide I don't want that red leather purse with the fringe, and as I pass a shelf with size 8.5 shoes, I put the purse there.
Now, I don't do these things purposely, to be annoying. I just do my shopping. I don't stop to think about how I can help the salespeople out in their jobs. I don't deliberately make as much of a mess as I can for them to pick up, but I also don't tiptoe around them. If customers never messed up the shelves, stock boys would have nothing to do. If customers always hung clothing back up on the hangers right, dressing room attendants (Insane Job, Part 2 forthcoming) would be standing around doing nothing but handing out numbers. Do your job. If you don't like your job, get a different one.
And let me just say, rolling your eyes at me and sighing a huge sigh has absolutely no effect on me. In fact, you're only prolonging your own pain, ensuring that I will put a pair of sunglasses in the kids toy section.
Also, my behavior changes according to my surroundings. When I am shopping in Bloomingdale's, where everything is in it's beautifully decorated place, I usually put things back where I found them. If you've never been to a Ross, it's not unusual to see a pink floral china plate amongst the picture frames; or a studded leather belt hanging on a rack with socks. And I'm not talking about Ross stores that I've been to!
At the finer stores, there are no dressing room Nazis. You take as many items in as you want, and you leave them in the dressing room when you are finished, for the quiet, invisible clothing fairies to come in and whisk them away. I respect that, so I tend to hang the items back up on the hangers nicely before I walk out of my dressing room.
So you see, I am not a bull in a china shop. I am a bull in Ross. I am a geisha girl in a china shop.
A funny story, my brother Eric used to work at Ross, and one day I was shopping there, and one of his coworkers saw me put an item I didn't want (which wasn't a pair of shoes) on a shoe rack. She later told him "Your sister is a BITCH!".
Now, this statment just proved to me what an idiot this woman was. To make a personal judgement call on a complete stranger purely on the basis of where they put an item they do not want to purchase is extremely immature.
I mean, there are plenty of other legitimate reasons that this woman could have called me a bitch, if she had only taken the time to get to know me.
Welcome to Being Suzanne Mosley
I feel, when I am shopping, that I am a customer. Strange, I know...I also feel as if, as a customer, I am not there to pay you so that I can do your job for you. I know, this gets weirder by the minute.
I will use the example of the Ross/Marshalls/TJMaxx line of stores, since I shop those chains very often. I have spent large amounts of money in these shops.
I feel absolutely no need to, for instance, make sure I put things back on the hangers right-side out after trying them on. I feel absolutely no remorse when halfway through the store, I decide I don't want that red leather purse with the fringe, and as I pass a shelf with size 8.5 shoes, I put the purse there.
Now, I don't do these things purposely, to be annoying. I just do my shopping. I don't stop to think about how I can help the salespeople out in their jobs. I don't deliberately make as much of a mess as I can for them to pick up, but I also don't tiptoe around them. If customers never messed up the shelves, stock boys would have nothing to do. If customers always hung clothing back up on the hangers right, dressing room attendants (Insane Job, Part 2 forthcoming) would be standing around doing nothing but handing out numbers. Do your job. If you don't like your job, get a different one.
And let me just say, rolling your eyes at me and sighing a huge sigh has absolutely no effect on me. In fact, you're only prolonging your own pain, ensuring that I will put a pair of sunglasses in the kids toy section.
Also, my behavior changes according to my surroundings. When I am shopping in Bloomingdale's, where everything is in it's beautifully decorated place, I usually put things back where I found them. If you've never been to a Ross, it's not unusual to see a pink floral china plate amongst the picture frames; or a studded leather belt hanging on a rack with socks. And I'm not talking about Ross stores that I've been to!
At the finer stores, there are no dressing room Nazis. You take as many items in as you want, and you leave them in the dressing room when you are finished, for the quiet, invisible clothing fairies to come in and whisk them away. I respect that, so I tend to hang the items back up on the hangers nicely before I walk out of my dressing room.
So you see, I am not a bull in a china shop. I am a bull in Ross. I am a geisha girl in a china shop.
A funny story, my brother Eric used to work at Ross, and one day I was shopping there, and one of his coworkers saw me put an item I didn't want (which wasn't a pair of shoes) on a shoe rack. She later told him "Your sister is a BITCH!".
Now, this statment just proved to me what an idiot this woman was. To make a personal judgement call on a complete stranger purely on the basis of where they put an item they do not want to purchase is extremely immature.
I mean, there are plenty of other legitimate reasons that this woman could have called me a bitch, if she had only taken the time to get to know me.
Welcome to Being Suzanne Mosley
Jobs That Are Insane, Part 1
Walmart Greeters.
Need I say more? Whoever created this job has never met me. If you think that having an old lady sitting in a chair saying "Hello, welcome to Walmart" in a monotone voice is going to do ANYTHING but piss me off, you are insane. I go into Walmart to buy things. I do not go there for the ambiance. Walmart is not an experience, it's cheap toilet paper.
Are there really people in the world who will spend more money because an old lady said "Hello" in a monotone voice??? "Wow! That old lady spoke to me! I suddenly feel like I need to buy a 50 inch flat screen TV!"
I never make eye contact with them, but it doesn't stop them from speaking to me.
Creepy...
Welcome to Being Suzanne Mosley
Need I say more? Whoever created this job has never met me. If you think that having an old lady sitting in a chair saying "Hello, welcome to Walmart" in a monotone voice is going to do ANYTHING but piss me off, you are insane. I go into Walmart to buy things. I do not go there for the ambiance. Walmart is not an experience, it's cheap toilet paper.
Are there really people in the world who will spend more money because an old lady said "Hello" in a monotone voice??? "Wow! That old lady spoke to me! I suddenly feel like I need to buy a 50 inch flat screen TV!"
I never make eye contact with them, but it doesn't stop them from speaking to me.
Creepy...
Welcome to Being Suzanne Mosley
Friday, July 4, 2008
Sorry Seems To Be The Most Irritating Word
I can't stand people who apologize all the time. I can't even explain how irritated I get inside when someone apologizes to me for some imagined slight that they've created in their own heads. I don't even need for someone to apologize to me for something they've done accidentally. If you're holding a knife in your hand, and you don't see me behind you, and you turn around quickly and slash me in the gut, I don't care if you say I'm sorry. You can't apologize for something that was completely accidental. You can say "wow! that was a rotten thing that just happened!", or "oh my goodness, I can't believe that I just slashed you in the gut!". The best thing to do, in my mind, is to help me stop bleeding. Drive me to the hospital. But, to me, apologizing in that situation is just very selfish. You say it to make yourself feel better. But you don't need to feel bad in the first place. It was an accident.
Strange?
Welcome to Being Suzanne Mosley
Strange?
Welcome to Being Suzanne Mosley
My Style Will Not Be Ignored
Today I shall quote some recent "knowledge drops" from that great thinker, Eric Lewis...
"....Like Forrester said, "write, don't think". Most blog posts should be rough drafts. Ignore Suzanne's style.
Remember Seth Godin. Blogging is supposed to be conversation, not preaching. It's two way. You say something wrong, someone comments, you make a correction. Much, much better than having never said it to start. The reader feels much more like a participant."
I guess, as usual, he's right. I don't really care how my readers feel, but the guys upstairs at Studio 54 might get a kick out of hearing it. I really don't know how to write and not think, but maybe I'll give that a try once in awhile. And feel free to converse back with me. The bouncer will know what to do with you.
Welcome to Being Suzanne Mosley.
"....Like Forrester said, "write, don't think". Most blog posts should be rough drafts. Ignore Suzanne's style.
Remember Seth Godin. Blogging is supposed to be conversation, not preaching. It's two way. You say something wrong, someone comments, you make a correction. Much, much better than having never said it to start. The reader feels much more like a participant."
I guess, as usual, he's right. I don't really care how my readers feel, but the guys upstairs at Studio 54 might get a kick out of hearing it. I really don't know how to write and not think, but maybe I'll give that a try once in awhile. And feel free to converse back with me. The bouncer will know what to do with you.
Welcome to Being Suzanne Mosley.
Thursday, July 3, 2008
You Really Think I'm Letting You In Here Wearing THAT??
I have a bouncer in my inner ear. This guy is in charge of what gets into my brain. He thinks my brain is this extremely exclusive club, similar to Studio 54 in it's heyday, and his job is to sort through the line of spoken words that are waiting in my ear to get through to the club.
Remember the images of the line outside of Studio 54...the bouncers scouring the line, looking for the beautiful people, the interesting people, the wealthy people...
The bouncer in my inner ear does the same thing. He scours the things that people are saying to me, and makes a judgement call. The words that are incredibly interesting, or really intelligent, or gut-bustingly funny, those words go right to the front of the line, and are ushered through the main door. These words are shown straight to the bar, and are taken to a great table where they can join the party.
This bouncer, just so you know, isn't easily impressed, but he is also very open minded. He's not looking for any one thing. Most everyone has the ability to get in, but not many people put any effort into getting in, probably because they don't realize how exclusive the club is.
Now, there is another door into this club. The bouncer uses this door for words that don't fit any of the previous criteria, but are so unbelievably ridiculous or unintelligent that they have entertainment value. These words don't know that they're getting in via the alley door. They just think that they're in! These crazy words are allowed to mingle downstairs with the beautiful words, and their presence adds that great spice that every party needs. What's a party without freaks to laugh at!??!
Those words that have absolutely no value are sent to the door marked marked "exit to the other ear". That door is a swinging door, as it is continually in motion.
Of course, there is a secret line. This line is for certain aforementioned people's words....those words get immediate entry, through a private door. These words are immediately ushered into the VIP lounge upstairs, and just like Studio 54, this is where the real partying goes on...the rumors of cocaine and orgies just might be true. These VIP's occasionally look downstairs at the partying words on the dance floor, and sometimes a lucky word is plucked from obscurity and is given a pass to come upstairs and join the real party.
Here's a quick example. A year or so ago, my sister brought her new friend Ed to meet us. I had no expectations (sorry Amy!), but within just a few minutes of talking to him, Ed's words were easily being ushered into the club through the main door. It didn't take long for the VIP's upstairs to notice Ed's words, and in no time at all, he was given the much sought after pass. Why? Because everything word had some weight to it. Every word provoked some thought. No word was nothing (and yes, that what I meant to say).
Ed is an example of someone who didn't have to work very hard to attract the bouncer's attention, his words stood on their own (cause trust me, it wasn't his outfit that got him in...!!!!). Unfortunately, some of you are going to have to work harder than that. Take a second and dress your words in a chic outfit, a funny clown hat, make your words passionate, or thought provoking. Just make your words be SOMETHING, and you have a shot at making it past the bouncer.
And let the story of Ed give you hope. You, too, could someday make it in to experience the mysterious world of my brain's upper realms...
Or you can be one of those who decides Studio 54 is the devil's playground, and should be avoided at all costs.
Your call.
Welcome to Being Suzanne Mosley
Remember the images of the line outside of Studio 54...the bouncers scouring the line, looking for the beautiful people, the interesting people, the wealthy people...
The bouncer in my inner ear does the same thing. He scours the things that people are saying to me, and makes a judgement call. The words that are incredibly interesting, or really intelligent, or gut-bustingly funny, those words go right to the front of the line, and are ushered through the main door. These words are shown straight to the bar, and are taken to a great table where they can join the party.
This bouncer, just so you know, isn't easily impressed, but he is also very open minded. He's not looking for any one thing. Most everyone has the ability to get in, but not many people put any effort into getting in, probably because they don't realize how exclusive the club is.
Now, there is another door into this club. The bouncer uses this door for words that don't fit any of the previous criteria, but are so unbelievably ridiculous or unintelligent that they have entertainment value. These words don't know that they're getting in via the alley door. They just think that they're in! These crazy words are allowed to mingle downstairs with the beautiful words, and their presence adds that great spice that every party needs. What's a party without freaks to laugh at!??!
Those words that have absolutely no value are sent to the door marked marked "exit to the other ear". That door is a swinging door, as it is continually in motion.
Of course, there is a secret line. This line is for certain aforementioned people's words....those words get immediate entry, through a private door. These words are immediately ushered into the VIP lounge upstairs, and just like Studio 54, this is where the real partying goes on...the rumors of cocaine and orgies just might be true. These VIP's occasionally look downstairs at the partying words on the dance floor, and sometimes a lucky word is plucked from obscurity and is given a pass to come upstairs and join the real party.
Here's a quick example. A year or so ago, my sister brought her new friend Ed to meet us. I had no expectations (sorry Amy!), but within just a few minutes of talking to him, Ed's words were easily being ushered into the club through the main door. It didn't take long for the VIP's upstairs to notice Ed's words, and in no time at all, he was given the much sought after pass. Why? Because everything word had some weight to it. Every word provoked some thought. No word was nothing (and yes, that what I meant to say).
Ed is an example of someone who didn't have to work very hard to attract the bouncer's attention, his words stood on their own (cause trust me, it wasn't his outfit that got him in...!!!!). Unfortunately, some of you are going to have to work harder than that. Take a second and dress your words in a chic outfit, a funny clown hat, make your words passionate, or thought provoking. Just make your words be SOMETHING, and you have a shot at making it past the bouncer.
And let the story of Ed give you hope. You, too, could someday make it in to experience the mysterious world of my brain's upper realms...
Or you can be one of those who decides Studio 54 is the devil's playground, and should be avoided at all costs.
Your call.
Welcome to Being Suzanne Mosley
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)