Who Wears The Pants?

I spent the day in NYC yesterday judging a same-sex ballroom/latin/country dance competition.


I must say I prefer when both partners wear the same type of outfit, either both in dresses, or both in tuxes. In same-sex dancing, during the course of one dance, the leader becomes the follower and the follower the leader. I personally don't like the appearance of the dress leading the tux. When the costumes are the same style, the change in lead doesn't jolt my senses for some reason.


There were some amazing women's Standard couples. One of the female Standard ladies in Group A wore these fantastic feather caps, like bathing caps that Esther Williams wore. The feathers would match her dress, electric blue, fushia, etc. She was European and older, and carried those feather wigs off as if she was the Queen. I loved it. Talked to her later, found out she lost all of her hair 10 years ago, and decided to make interesting wigs and hats her "thing". Love that...


Why do I support same-sex dancing? I've been same sex dancing since I first learned to dance, back in the K.P. Corral days. There were never enough guys to go around, so I always ended up being the "guy". I'm 5'11", so it only made sense.


I believe I am the dancer and coach I am today in part because I was always "being the guy". I know what I want to feel as a follower, and because I have learned to lead, I know how to explain to a leader what to do to give that feeling to the follower.


I enjoy leading, because it puts me back in control for a moment. Choreography is my strong point, and I can put that to use in an immediate form when I'm leading.


For me, it has nothing to do with sexual preference or relationships. It's about expanding your knowledge base. It's about stretching yourself. It's about trying to see things from the other person's point of view. It not only makes you a better dancer, but can make you a better dance partner, and a better person.


And sometimes, it's just nice to be the boss.........




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